I don’t keep a lot of stuff. Probably because I’ve moved so much over the years, an activity made monumentally easier by not own too much. One exception, though, is that I don’t think I’ve ever thrown out a notebook. At least not one that I know has some of my creative writing in it; all the college and high school ones are long gone. I’ve probably got a dozen and a half of them, all various shapes and sizes, some filled from front to back, others more empty than full. Sometimes I even started writing in one and finished in another, even though there was plenty of space left in the first one. Not sure why I kept them all. I’m willing to guess it has something to do with a belief that one of these days I’m going to get struck by lightning and, after waking from the resulting coma, I’ll have developed the appropriate work ethic to finish all the various projects that I started. That, or after I die (or become famous) all of these resulting fits and starts will suddenly be in demand.
I was going through the collection a few weeks ago, looking for everything I had for the novel I wanted to get started on, when I came across this. By the context of the end of it, it feels like something I wrote for a friend, but here it is, unedited:
IT may sounds like a blatant overstatement, but the fact of the matter is that in life shit happens. It may be easier to say than understand, but life is an ever moving entity constantly seeking balance. The bad times come to temper the good, and the good times come to make us forget about the bad, and no matter how painful or troublesome a time may be, there is nothing that can not be overcome. We each have the strength to overcome what comes our way when it does come. Some thing that you may have ignored years ago that has now come back is no more intimidating or threatening than it was before. If it has grown, understand that you too have grown as well, more than it has, and now, even though you may not think so, you are ready to face it and deal with it and be able to truly put it behind you, this time with all the issues resolved. Trust me, I know. It does get better. If you ever need a favor or just someone to talk to (even if it’s about anything other than what’s bothering you) to have a drink with, play mahki with, whatever, I’m here for you, and you know where to find me.
(Let me start by getting the critical comment out of the way: man, I can be overly wordy when I want to be!)
It’s funny to look back and see that, even in a much different time and place in my life, I was still trying to live with a more pragmatic and positive attitude. Unfortunately there was no date on the page in the notebook, but based on what else was in there and the reference to mahki, a computer game I was obsessed with for a time, my guess is this was written while in Los Angeles or just after I left. This means we’re looking at 10 years in the past at least. And it helps to reassure me that this, all of this life, is a journey. No matter what path it seems to be taking at the time, as long as we continue to keep certain guide posts in our life, we will find our way to where we are supposed to be, and who we are supposed to be.
PopcornJackTerry 